XXI. I feel compelled to describe, as clearly as I can, the way I have experienced or felt the guidance, direction, pleasant influence, and presence of the loving Mother and loving Father in recent days.
My spiritual gaze was constantly turned towards them. Their memory and image were almost imprinted in my mind and understanding, in a lasting and substantial way without any contribution from me to earn something similar through prior thoughts or other personal activities. It occurred so habitually and substantially that everything flowed almost automatically, and they, as I understand, appeared at the peak of my spirit, without any prior thinking of them or anticipation of their presence.
It was so ingrained that even if I seemed to try my hardest to distract myself and to drive away that vision or experience of their presence, I would achieve nothing unless I committed something that would displease them. For then their presence would darken and vanish, along with that tender, sweet, innocent, and at the same time respectful and attentive love towards them.
I also saw them representatively, distinctly and indistinctly. This vision was both clear and unclear; I do not know how to clarify it and make it comprehensible. It seems to me similar to what St. Teresa writes about some manifestations of the loving Mother and loving Father that she received, when she says that her attention was not focused on something particular in their person, but that with a simple gaze and spiritual delight, she beheld the whole being of the loving Mother.
This gaze was so simple that I could not regard one without the other, but as two in one and as something dual-simple. This gaze was understood in the unity of the Divine essence.
